


Watching Sunsets from Car Seats

by andlucyy



Category: The Outsiders - All Media Types
Genre: Gay, How Do I Tag, Internal Conflict, M/M, Oops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:21:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26021101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andlucyy/pseuds/andlucyy
Summary: Steve thought of the moment he told Ponyboy that he used to love Soda a lot.
Relationships: Ponyboy Curtis/Steve Randle
Comments: 7
Kudos: 36





	Watching Sunsets from Car Seats

**Author's Note:**

> hiya :) this is kind of a continuation of my last steveboy (if you could even call it that) fic “Gone”. i hope you like this 💗💗💗💗💗

Steve thought of the moment he told Ponyboy that he used to love Soda a lot. He didn’t really know why he did, maybe it was because that was the first intimate moment he’d had in a long while, but other than that, it was pretty normal (if you could describe something like that as ‘normal’). There wasn’t really anything off about Ponyboy’s reaction, he kind of just looked like he understood. But of course he understood, because he’d lost Soda and Curly Shepard to the war. Steve felt kinda sorry for Pony; he’d lost so much, so fast, so young. 

Regardless of what either thought of Steve’s confession, they began spending more time together after it. The being with each other alone was a little weird to them because they hadn’t really done it before, and the circumstances that caused it were less than favourable. Steve remembered the days where they’d be at each other’s necks, constantly causing abrasion and forming rifts in their very limited relationship. He knew what Pony thought of him, and he understood why — He was a huge asshole to Ponyboy when they were younger. 

Things changed after Johnny and Dally died, though. It was as if Pony had grown up, and Steve had just stopped being bothered by him. Stuff like that didn’t matter to them anymore (but their past experiences didn’t really give them much reason to be around each other). 

As hours passed in the DX, which were considerably less lonely with Pony, and had actual conversations that weren’t full of snarky remarks, Steve realised that they got along pretty well. He liked that they could talk about things he couldn’t talk about with the rest of the gang, but also because they could also talk about meaningless things. It was nice, especially at the times when anything else was too much. Steve always knew that Pony was destined to get out of the shithole town, and for most of his life, he prayed for the day to arrive quicker. But he quickly grew to appreciate the fact that Pony was still in Tulsa, something he never thought he’d say. 

They spent so much time together that Steve began noticing things that he never thought he’d see in Ponyboy, like the way they could relate to each other, and how the same dark pink blush still crept up on him when he was even slightly embarrassed, and the way the corners of his mouth were always upturned when he read or wrote, and how he looked so much like and unlike Soda at the same time. He was definitely good looking like Soda, which Steve had never taken note of before, but apart from that, the brothers had nothing in common. It was difficult for Steve to describe what Pony was like, and how he differed from his optimistic, charming older brother. After many late nights of pondering (sometimes, Steve got scared at how Ponyboy Curtis of all people was keeping him up at night), he concluded Pony had more depth than Soda.

But, if Steve compared the number of sleepless nights he had trying to figure out Pony to the number of sleepless nights he had to trying to figure out how he felt about Pony, he’d laugh at himself for even worrying about the former. Of course, he liked being around Pony, and how he felt when he was around Pony, but how much he liked it, and how much was he willing to allow himself to like were the questions troubling him. The fact that he was even questioning said enough for Steve to completely freak himself out. He’d never see Pony in that way, is what he’d tell himself, even though Steve saw Pony as more of a friend now than he ever had before. All his sentiments were confusing — whenever he felt something new (and typically nice) blooming, his old feelings come and try to nip it at the bud, then they’d exist together in his mind, in competition with each other. 

It was only on a cool evening that he finally sorted out what had been too obvious all along. 

The two were together, as usual. He’d just got off the afternoon shift and Pony’d just come from the local track team practice (he’d said he wanted to keep up with the sport, but Steve guessed he just needed to kill time. Apparently, a gap year with no money to travel leaves a lot of it free). They were sitting in Steve’s car outside the DX, thinking of what to do. 

“Do you wanna get something’ to eat?” Steve asked. 

“Nah, Darry’s cookin’ later, and he’d skin me if I wasted that money.” 

Steve hummed and continued thinking. He began recounting what Pony did when he was younger that they could do. 

“What about, um… didn’t you like to watch sunsets? We could do that, it’s about the right time,” he suggested. 

Pony blushed slightly and smiled bashfully, not looking away from Steve. “You remember that, huh?” 

Steve nodded and smirked. “You kinda wouldn’t shut up about it for a while, and you wrote about it in your English thing.” 

Pony blushed more, eyes widened. “Did you read that?” 

Steve nodded and his smirk grew. “Do I still have my complicated swirls?” 

“God,” Pony groaned, slouching into his seat.

“I’ll shut up about it,” Steve said and started the engine, “for now,” he added as he drove away from the DX. 

“Where are we going?” Pony asked, swiftly changing the subject. 

“I dunno, the lot, I guess,” Steve shrugged, “it don’t really matter, do it?” 

“Nah, anywhere’s fine.” 

It was only a few minutes down to the lot from where they were, and they talked about brainless topics, like Two’s new blonde. 

“It’s kinda sad how Two only goes after blondes. I mean, his soulmate could be a brunette or a red head and he’d never know, cause he never even considered ‘em,” Pony rambled. 

“Yeah, a red head like you,” Steve teased, reaching over and messing up Pony’s hair even more so than it already was. 

“Cut it out.” Pony half-heartedly swatted at Steve’s arm until he withdrew it. 

Steve smiled as he parked the car in the corner of the lot. The incredibly clear sky was just beginning to turn pinkish. 

“Man, I can’t remember the last time I watched a sunset,” Pony started, running his hands through his hair, “it musta been… with Johnny, at the church…” he trailed off. 

Steve looked at Pony, who was staring out the windscreen. He decided to try and change the subject — he could tell that there were unpleasant memories running around Pony’s head, and that he was trying hard not to notice them. 

“I’m glad you’re here, Pony.” 

Ponyboy turned to look at him, slightly shocked at the sudden statement. “Why do you say?” 

“Well… you’re good to make fun of, for starters,” Steve joked. Pony smiled. “And it’s nice talkin’ to ya. You always seem to understand.” 

Pony turned light pink. “Thanks,” he mumbled. 

“It’s not just that, though,” Steve continued, his train of thought blindly guiding him, “you’re a real interestin’ person. Kinda different from everyone else I’ve met in my life, in a good way, y’know?” Steve glanced at Pony, who was even pinker. 

“Yeah, I guess.” 

“It’s cool to be around ya. It feels… nice, which I never thought I would feel again, after everything,” Steve said, referring to Soda. 

“Yeah, you do the same too. I thought I’d lost anyone who kinda... understood, but you, the person who I thought understood least, of all people, do.” Pony smiled wistfully. 

“That’s just the way things turn out, huh?” Steve smiled too. 

“Yeah.” 

He turned away from the sunset, which was now shades of purple, pink and gold, to look at Pony, who was ignoring the scenery and staring at Steve. 

Steve maintained eye contact with Pony, unable to fully match the intensity of his gaze. His green eyes were lively, and it was almost as if they were staring inside Steve, not at him. The thought of leaning over and kissing him crossed his mind more than once. Imagining what it’d be like to cup Pony’s face in his hands, or run his hands through his hair kept on shoving itself back to the front of his mind when he tried to expel it, and that certainly wasn’t helping with the urges to kiss Pony. 

He felt so stupid for liking Pony, but he couldn’t understand why. Pony wasn’t bad, in fact he was the opposite. He was smart, understanding, and willing to put up with Steve’s shit, which is everything that Steve wanted. Maybe it was because Steve hadn’t liked anyone in months, not since Soda left, and he was reluctant to open up that side of him again, or because he felt like he was replacing Soda with Pony, which he wasn’t. How could he try and replace Soda with someone so different? Besides, how he felt for Pony was completely separate from how he felt for Soda. The affection and relationship with Pony ran deeper than it had with anyone else for Steve — he couldn’t quite believe that was true, but he’d never had that kind of connection with Soda. Or maybe it was because Steve was scared at how quickly Pony had gotten him to that stage, and how he knew the inevitable Pony leaving him was inevitable. 

I’m not gonna kiss Ponyboy, not until this is figured out. Not until—

Steve’s thought was cut off by the skip of his heartbeat as he saw Ponyboy closing the space between them at a speed he didn’t have time to comprehend. Before he knew it, Pony’s lips crashed against his and his hands were against the sides of Steve’s face. Steve’s heart felt like it had stopped beating and a warmth spread through him, starting from his stomach and regrouping at his cheeks, which were brilliantly red. He felt frozen in his seat. He tried willing himself to move, kiss back, do something but he couldn’t. He just sat, frozen, feeling completely helpless. 

Pony pulled away almost as quickly and abruptly as he’d leaned in. His eyes were wide, his breathing was uneven, and his face was red like Steve had never seen before. It looked like he’d run a marathon, not kissed someone, although Steve was sure that they were at least on the same level of metal and physical pressure. Steve had so much to say, but before he could do anything, Pony threw the door open and left Steve sitting dumbly in his car seat. 

That kiss was better than anything Steve had ever experienced before, and it was at that moment when it all became clear. His feelings for Ponyboy were everything he was dreading and hoping for at the same time. Somehow, all that time, he couldn’t see it. 

“Shit,” Steve whispered, staring at the golden sky, “I fucking love him.”


End file.
